Safe and Sound: Amelia Learns to Trust Her Foster Father
While the children who come to Big Oak Girls’ Ranch each bring their own story, there is something that nearly every one lacks: a father.
Big Oak Ranch’s campuses look like normal neighborhoods with brick houses. The only difference is that they’re all foster homes. Two houseparents, a foster mom and dad, live in each home and care for the children who come to live on the ranch. Mike and his wife serve as houseparents at the Girls’ Ranch, where they create a family environment for the children.
For Mike, it’s an exercise in building trust. The girls tend to accept their foster mom sooner, and Mike knows it often stems from past hurt. That’s why he takes his role so seriously and cherishes moments of connection with his girls. Mike shares the story of a precious moment that occurred when one daughter finally realized she could trust him completely.
Earning His Daughters’ Trust
As a longtime foster father, Mike understands why most girls who come to Big Oak Ranch hesitate to relax around him. Many experienced hurt or abandonment from men in the past. Because of this, Mike intentionally works to earn their trust and prove himself.
“They have no idea what to expect from me,” Mike says.
One girl, Amelia, arrived at their house with the same reservations. Amelia never had a father figure in her life before Mike, and while she acted polite and respectful toward him, she kept her guard up for a long time. Still, Mike never gave up. He spent months gently talking with her and patiently waiting for her answers. He celebrated her wins, asked about her aspirations, and cared about her interests. On bad days, Mike was right there to offer his support. He made it clear that he expected nothing in return, and gradually, Amelia began to let down her walls.
“It’s my responsibility to live out what a loving, caring, godly man looks like in a family,” Mike explains.
Safe and Sound
Later in the year, Mike and his wife took their girls on a beach trip with the other families of Big Oak Ranch. On their last day, Amelia and another of their girls wanted to go to the beach. Mike volunteered to take them, and the trio spent hours playing and enjoying the water.
But white sand and sunshine couldn’t hold a candle to the incredible moment that came next.
That afternoon, Amelia wrapped herself in a towel, asked Mike to make room on the beach chair, and sat beside him. She then laid her head on his shoulder and fell asleep, safe and sound. The significance of that moment gripped Mike’s heart. Finally, Amelia let go of her fears and allowed herself to trust him.
“On that day she decided I was her dad, and she was my daughter,” Mike says, the emotion in his voice strong. “She was comfortable enough there to fall asleep on my shoulder and snore gently while on a beach full of people.”
The Big Oak Effect
In Mike’s opinion, Big Oak Ranch makes those moments possible, showing kids what a healthy family looks like firsthand. It tells them that they belong and that they’re loved regardless of prior circumstances. Crucially, Big Oak Ranch allows houseparents to share Christ by walking out their faith in front of and eventually with them.
“I get to share my love with my girls while showing them that their Heavenly Father loves them even more,” Mike says. For him, it’s the highest honor.
Every child deserves a loving family, including a reliable father figure. We’re proud to partner with Big Oak Ranch as they help children create healthy familial relationships that point them to God’s love.
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